Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
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