Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
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