he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
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