just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
You were trust falling into bushes
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
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