i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
