I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
