Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize