butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
