the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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