Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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