Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Fuck me I smell like cheese
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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