Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
