We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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