it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
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