If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
