dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Randomize
