is your mom at the bar?
I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
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