Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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