I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
We talked him into tasing himself.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
