I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Randomize