If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize