My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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