Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
