He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I looked at my own cervix.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Randomize
