She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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