I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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