She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.