sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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