Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
thus making me awesome and them whores
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
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Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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