I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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