You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Randomize