You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Of course I have a pirate flag
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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