YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
