I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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