what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
