He is like the real live version of the state fair..
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
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You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
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I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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