and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
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I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
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I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.