i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
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