I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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