Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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