she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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