I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
