I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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