One girl and one boy is just not enough.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Randomize
