Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize