I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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