so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
