I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
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