Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
