Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
